I’m gonna be straight with you. I’m not a fan of Halloween. I can hear you saying..don’t you love the candy and dressing up? Well, I guess the short answer is yes. I do like the candy. It’s all the other stuff that goes along with it that I could do without. It’s no secret that I am obsessed with all things Christmas (read more about my holiday obsession here) If it were up to me, I would skip Halloween altogether and move right into the season of giving and gratitude. Don’t hate me.
Please don’t scare me
No, I’m not interested in watching blood and guts in any form. As a matter of fact, you can keep your haunted houses and your creepy corn mazes (who the heck invented this?) to yourselves. I don’t enjoy nightmares or night terrors so I’m out for the scary movie marathon. I prefer to have lovely dreams of winning PowerBall and becoming a high roller at Playa Bowls. And no, you can’t entice me with Halloween part 47. Even if you bring back Jamie Lee Curtis.
My costumes are lame
If I were competing in this whole parenting game (read more about that here) I would be losing miserably. I can only remember one time when I had fairly decent costume, but most of the time they are lame. I can’t make anything, so my kid is getting store bought (the HORROR). As for me, does a hat or headband count as a costume? Because last year I wore a unicorn snow hat and called it a day. I’m not in the business of sewing or anything like that, so I’m going to leave you crafty mamas to that.
I’m not in love with pumpkin
Aside from my favorite pumpkin pancake recipe (more great breakfast ideas here) and maybe some pumpkin bread, I could live without the pumpkin obsession. I can live without the pumpkin spiced lattes, pumpkin pasta and general pumpkin obsession that goes along with the month of October. I don’t like craving pumpkins or painting weird faces on vegetables (is pumpkin even a vegetable?) either. Although my hubs is all about the Jack-O-Lantern carving, I could live without it. I most certainly don’t want to be surrounded by a sea of burning pumpkins either. I’m happy to enjoy your pictures though!
Healthy Snacks Stink
Back in the day I was anxiously awaiting the delivery of a king sized snickers bar. Or any candy bar for that matter. We would systematically egg homes that gave us pennies or fruit as our treats (sorry, mom). Nowadays everyone has to give out lame treats that healthy. Why on earth would I want to ring doorbells all evening if my treat is going to be a bag of raisins? I mean…are you going to start handing out avocado toast next? Well, I guess I wouldn’t mind that so much. But not when I’m expecting candy. What happened to the good ole chocolate bars of yore. Maybe I’m just too old. Exactly why this holiday isn’t for me.
While I appreciate the effort and energy some of y’all put into this holiday, I’m okay to keep my sights on Christmas. So while you guys are carefully placing the bales of hay on your porch, you can find me addressing my Christmas cards this month. Just kidding. No, I’m really not.
Anyone else wanna take a pass on Halloween?