Bad As A Mother

Are you bad as a mother?

I recently had a conversation about how I had planned to keep my car neat in 2018. Guess what? I’ve been working on this for 20 years and nothing has really changed. And then it hit me. It’s just not that important to me. Some say it takes three weeks for something to become a habit. I say that if it is important to you, you will make it happen. So what about this year? Maybe you want to make more time to travel or to spend more time in your garden, but before you take on some new projects, read this.  I have three things you should spend a little more time on this year.

Make Time Professionally:

I hear women all the time saying they don’t have time. They don’t have time to change careers or build a new business. I’m calling BS on this one. If you don’t have the time, you make the time. There’s a great Ted Talk on the number of “free” hours we have in a week, here. The video goes on to talk about the 168 hours we have each week to spend doing the things that are important to us. If we really started paying attention to the time we waste scrolling on Facebook, I bet we could find some to make our career change happen. Just sayin’

No, new moms, I’m not talking to you. Your life is insane. Read this. I’m here for you guys. I’m talking about the mamas out there with a little breathing room when the kids go to school. I mean yeah, go get your coffee on. Go get your gym on. Go get your shopping on. But don’t forget to go get your passion on. It’s okay if you passion is homemaking. You keep doing those Pinterest-worthy projects and I will keep thinking you’re the bomb. But if you find yourself saying that you are eager to do, try, be something else, then stop making excuses and go do it.

Make Time for Your Kids:

I can hear you laughing already. Make time for my kids? My kids are here every freaking minute of the day. I feel you, mama but hear me out. Last week I found myself in the kitchen making dinner, half writing a blog, half reading school newsletters and half working on purging my home. (Go check out the challenge here) What I realized was that my daughter was somewhere in the “background” of all the important and urgent things that I was doing. In fact, I wasn’t actually spending any time with her. Wow. How many days have I done that? I decided that I was actually going to make time for her. Not because I had to, but because I wanted to. If you find yourself letting your kids hang on autopilot in the background while you handle more “important” things, let me be the first to set you straight. No judgment, but that’s not QT.

Make Time for Your VIP’s:

You know who I mean. Your VIP is your hubs (hopefully) or your friends and maybe even some members of your family. Your VIP’s are the most important people in your life. They may live in your home or across the country. They may be related by blood or bonded by motherhood. Whoever they are, you have to make time for them. Between work, travel, parenting, and family obligations, my two best friends and I only get together every few months. But we get together. I hear some of you talking about how your kids need you and you can’t possible meet friends or  coordinate date nights. What are you modeling for your kids? That  the relationships you had before children are disposable? That those people no longer matter because you are a mom? I hate to be the one to tell you this, but that shouldn’t be how it works. Do I love my daughter any less because I meet some friends for dinner once in awhile? Do I love her less because I leave her for a few hours so I can date my husband? I’m going with no. Children need to see you engaged and involved in different types of relationships. So get on the phone to your old college friend or new mom friend and grab some coffee!

Time is a finite resource and it’s one of the most precious things we have in our lives. Think about how you would spend your time if you could. Think about the people and things you love most in this life and then go ahead and make that time!

 

 

 

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